Sorry, little venting required!

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Why are subs so fucking stupid sometimes? How many times do I have to say when I give a task  it’s got to been done ASAP…not when they find it convenient. One would think after 2 years that would be a lesson learned? Damn lucky this one is far far away otherwise he would be getting such a beating. Will come up with an online version…worry not!

God these posts are so unlike me…but they are actually fun to write. Yeah so…as I said, the guy is not stupid. During dinner he kept making jokes about him wanting a slave….which I found suspicious. I think he was pulling my chain.

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Later at my place he said something like (memory is vague) “well being a Domme…bla bla”. I made him repeat that. Then he just looked at me and said “stop prentending otherwise you’re a Domme”. I was like Oh really you figured that out?” He said yes and I said dont think that means you know all about me. We did not discuss it or go into details much after that exchange. He did not seem concerned or threatened either.

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Again…let’s see what time will tell

Yes there is still a lingering odor of vanilla in my romantic life. And right now its actually doing me some good I have to say.

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If you recall I wrote about a 2nd date I had recently with a guy who may actually be kinky and caught on somewhat to me pretty quick. After I last saw him he was off to BC for the holidays. Not only did I have to wait to get a call back, I had to wait from him to come back to wait for the call. Pure torture.

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At the same time I had 2 other good candidates with whom I was emailing but had not met. Both also were away during the holidays. Only one kept writing while away. So figuring how short the memory span can be with online dating I certainly did not expect to find myself with all 3 again once the Christmas and NYE’s dust settled. But the missing 3rd guy reappeared by email to reconnect yesterday too.

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But back to Not so Vanilla guy….3rd date tonight. Yes he called promptly after his return and asked me out. My few vanilla dates since BDSM has entered  my life have always so interesting to reflect upon. I can’t just boss around off the bat. And this guy, he is very domineering in his life too and very European. So its putting a whole twist on things and has not lead to head butting yet but could. As I said last time…we shall see what happens with time.

Well this will actually be a BDSM/Fetish free weekend. It’s Christmas time on full swing this weekend. Work party tonight and vanilla friends tomorrow.

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As you have seen from the last posts things went sour with a special someone. Not a sub so much, a mix of kink and vanilla. I am not detailing anything but I really need to just purge a bit my emotions and although my blog is entertainment it does have a diary side to it. So anyways although I am not keeping false hope the door is neither completely closed. A little time apart will bring forth the right decision for both involved. of course brock, my long distance slave, would love to give ‘him’ a beating lol.

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The last 2 evenings I have been bad. I have been purging my demons emotionally and trying to break my personal emotional cycle of such a situation. Its not easy and yes the first night was spent with a phone call to 2 girlfriends  and a bottle of wine. We spoke  about everything, not just what happened to me. But I wanted to get drunk. Thing is I never ate and finished the bottle in about 2 hours. I got up from the couch and I realized this was going to be challenge. I went and snacked just a bit. I lied back down and it was spinning. Hate that. Then I did something I have not done in probably about 13 years. I threw up from too much alcohol.  OK most of you are saying gross…ewww. And yes it was not fun. But man it felt AWESOME. I felt like a bad young adult breaking a rule of society. The concept did me a lot of good.

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Last night I had dinner at a girlfriend’s place. We chatted, drank, and again I was bad I smoked up something I never do either. Then we watched the worst movie 9but funny): Zombie Strippers, with Jenna Jameson. Thank god I was stoned cause it was bad. Its totally a porn plot without the sex. I am not a fan of porn but at some point I was just screaming at the TV “FUCK ALREADY”. It was again a great purging excellent night.

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Tonight with the xmas party I will again been nicely marinated with booze. Sat will be more quiet. But I am doing much better today. Of  course ‘his’ bday is coming up and I had ordered him a special gift from Funsexxxtoys. It arrived this morning. Still can use it but its kinda made for 2, not a solo thing. Oh well! Thanks for reading and I’ll leave you with a hot FemDom pic from Men in Pain for the weekend!

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Even if by phone….booze and girlfriends are the best!

You know who you are!
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Update: the following morning…I wrote this super, super, super drunk! lol

Apparently its not worth removing but just thought I would add that.

Minor …but still

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This past Friday Dec 04th was my second time giving a workshop at Club Sin and well actually to the community as well. I decided to pick protocol as a subject. Not exactly the easiest one at all. I think this is the one term in our lifestyle so many people, specially newbies, have trouble wrapping their minds around.

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There is just not a whole lot out there as a concrete description. God knows I researched the net…in the past for myself and recently for this workshop. Now Party Protocol and Public Scene Protocol texts abound. But its how do build a protocol within a union of two or more people that is so difficult. Sure you can come up with 10 rules to stick by but that is only a fraction of what a protocol is.

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The best article I have found online are notes published from a talk Laura Antoniou gave back in 2000 entitled Establishing a Protocol.

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For some reason, although I have not had a massive amount of experience in it, I just really get the concept of it. I am ultra organized, even in my disorders. I don’t think a whole lot of people are fully experienced in protocol because it is a) exhausting to be applying such rigid rules and b) hard to find a sub who can operate under such regimentation and scrutiny. Although I am sure many do manage to live a full protocol lifestyle it is not a majority. So no I am not full protocol. I do enjoy many aspects of it though and I like the ceremony behind it.

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I have had subs were rules were much more strongly present in our dynamic then others. Right now I find myself in a more romantic circumstance with someone who is green to this lifestyle and probably more kinky then anything else. We do not have a protocol established. But we have a lot of fun.

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This last comment is to say no matter what protocol you do decide upon its has to be rebuilt (partly) a new with every new person that enters your life on such a level.  Protocol cannot work without flexibility. My new beau sometimes asks me if I can be happy with him knowing he cannot be the ultimate sub I would like. I say as long as you are kinky in general I have no issues with it (and that he is find with my tacking out my sadistic needs on someone else lol).

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If you cannot be somewhat flexible you will remain alone. Let me give you a vanilla example. If you say your future partner must want to be beaten to bruises every time, but kneel at all times, must never speak and be wet and ready 24hrs a day…its the equivalent of saying your vanilla better half must be blond, must be making so much a year, must want children and must never do overtime. Its just probably not ever going to happen. Sure certain things are really essential and you have to complete needs but give some of it a rest and widen your horizons or you may pass up a really amazing opportunity!

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OK, that is it. I am declaring a new scientific fact:

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All males have a South Park chromosome allowing them to repeat a script, word for word, of any episode of South park from any season…whether you want them to or not!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I got nothing against South park, I even like it.

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But Ladies, this chromosome needs to be tamed and disciplined!

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Finally…after 1 week offline, due to the stupidist host transfer because of old host, I am BACK ONLINE.

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I missed not blogging so bad, it was such a stress. But now I am back….and will have a lot to cacth up on…so stay tuned.

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Mystress Lady Evyl

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I love subliminal costumes. This is what I wore to a Fetish Halloween event…with a syringe in hand threatning to inject them with this poison.

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